AMPHIKTYON.BLOGSPOT.COM: Report: Zero Males Affected As Feminists Go On Sex Strike Lifestyle May 6th, 2022 - BabylonBee.com 8k Shares 2k SHARE 1.9k SHARE SHARE NEW YORK, NY—After feminists around the country vowed to stop having sex, men across the nation have remained blissfully unaware anything has changed. "Huh? Who stopped having sex?" responded every man told of the development. "Wow, I had no idea. Good for them, I guess?" The so-called 'sex strike' had been launched by leftist women in response to the potential overturning of Roe v. Wade. "The right is trying to create this dystopian world where sex has some connection to pregnancy and babies," explained pro-abortion protester Lona Malachi. "Pregnancy is basically making a woman your slave, just like in The Handmaid's Tale. So as long as sex has anything to do with babies, we simply won't have it!" she exclaimed, before attempting to inhale air without taking in oxygen. Despite the clarion call for an end to sex from female media personalities and politicians, surveys have shown that absolutely zero men have been affected. "Our research indicates the strike has not hit the intended target," said sociology professor Sharon Young. "The nation's cats, however, have reported a general increase in angry yelling by their owners." At publishing time, liberals were calling for a hunger strike until it becomes legal for doctors to suck food out of your stomach so eating doesn't risk leading to digestion. This man shared misinformation online, so the Ministry of Truth -- err, sorry, the Disinformation Governance Board -- detained him for questioning. Will he stand strong in the face of torture? Subscribe to The Babylon Bee on YouTube There are 57 comments on this article. You must become a premium subscriber or login to view or post comments on this article. Get the Bee delivered straight to your inbox: Your Email Address... Sign Up Previous Article 25 Things More Effective Than The COVID Vaccine Next Article Biden Repeats False Claim He Once Had An Abortion Sponsored Content Countries Might Be Offering Citizenship by Investment Countries Might Be Offering Citizenship by Investment Daily Tips av-override 00:00/00:40 exp-player-logo Ears Ringing? Doctor: If You Have Tinnitus, Do This Immediately! Ears Ringing? Doctor: If You Have Tinnitus, Do This Immediately! Daily Healthy Living Tips Is My Space a Good Fit for Airbnb? Is My Space a Good Fit for Airbnb? Airbnb The Close Relationship Between Stress and Sleep The Close Relationship Between Stress and Sleep Go Daddy Related Articles Lifestyle Local Woman Using Complex NASA Algorithm To Remember Everything She's Boycotting July 19th, 2016 2 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables Inspiredot Lifestyle Bigoted Woman Assumes Newborn Baby’s Species August 15th, 2018 3 Lifestyle IKEA Releases 100-Foot-Long Dining Table For 2020 Gatherings November 26th, 2020 58 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables Inspiredot Lifestyle Man Holding Door For Woman Clearly Sexist Pig February 27th, 2016 7 Lifestyle Man Who Identified As M1 Abrams Tank Killed In Action January 10th, 2018 12 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables Inspiredot Lifestyle The Bee Explains: What Is The Nashville Statement? September 1st, 2017 3 Sign up for

Friday, 6 May 2022

Report: Zero Males Affected As Feminists Go On Sex Strike Lifestyle May 6th, 2022 - BabylonBee.com 8k Shares 2k SHARE 1.9k SHARE SHARE NEW YORK, NY—After feminists around the country vowed to stop having sex, men across the nation have remained blissfully unaware anything has changed. "Huh? Who stopped having sex?" responded every man told of the development. "Wow, I had no idea. Good for them, I guess?" The so-called 'sex strike' had been launched by leftist women in response to the potential overturning of Roe v. Wade. "The right is trying to create this dystopian world where sex has some connection to pregnancy and babies," explained pro-abortion protester Lona Malachi. "Pregnancy is basically making a woman your slave, just like in The Handmaid's Tale. So as long as sex has anything to do with babies, we simply won't have it!" she exclaimed, before attempting to inhale air without taking in oxygen. Despite the clarion call for an end to sex from female media personalities and politicians, surveys have shown that absolutely zero men have been affected. "Our research indicates the strike has not hit the intended target," said sociology professor Sharon Young. "The nation's cats, however, have reported a general increase in angry yelling by their owners." At publishing time, liberals were calling for a hunger strike until it becomes legal for doctors to suck food out of your stomach so eating doesn't risk leading to digestion. This man shared misinformation online, so the Ministry of Truth -- err, sorry, the Disinformation Governance Board -- detained him for questioning. Will he stand strong in the face of torture? Subscribe to The Babylon Bee on YouTube There are 57 comments on this article. You must become a premium subscriber or login to view or post comments on this article. Get the Bee delivered straight to your inbox: Your Email Address... Sign Up Previous Article 25 Things More Effective Than The COVID Vaccine Next Article Biden Repeats False Claim He Once Had An Abortion Sponsored Content Countries Might Be Offering Citizenship by Investment Countries Might Be Offering Citizenship by Investment Daily Tips av-override 00:00/00:40 exp-player-logo Ears Ringing? Doctor: If You Have Tinnitus, Do This Immediately! Ears Ringing? Doctor: If You Have Tinnitus, Do This Immediately! Daily Healthy Living Tips Is My Space a Good Fit for Airbnb? Is My Space a Good Fit for Airbnb? Airbnb The Close Relationship Between Stress and Sleep The Close Relationship Between Stress and Sleep Go Daddy Related Articles Lifestyle Local Woman Using Complex NASA Algorithm To Remember Everything She's Boycotting July 19th, 2016 2 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables Inspiredot Lifestyle Bigoted Woman Assumes Newborn Baby’s Species August 15th, 2018 3 Lifestyle IKEA Releases 100-Foot-Long Dining Table For 2020 Gatherings November 26th, 2020 58 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables Inspiredot Lifestyle Man Holding Door For Woman Clearly Sexist Pig February 27th, 2016 7 Lifestyle Man Who Identified As M1 Abrams Tank Killed In Action January 10th, 2018 12 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables 11 Fruits Commonly Mistaken for Vegetables Inspiredot Lifestyle The Bee Explains: What Is The Nashville Statement? September 1st, 2017 3 Sign up for

Report: Zero Males Affected As Feminists Go On Sex Strike

May 6th, 2022 - BabylonBee.com

NEW YORK, NY—After feminists around the country vowed to stop having sex, men across the nation have remained blissfully unaware anything has changed.

"Huh? Who stopped having sex?" responded every man told of the development. "Wow, I had no idea. Good for them, I guess?"

The so-called 'sex strike' had been launched by leftist women in response to the potential overturning of Roe v. Wade. "The right is trying to create this dystopian world where sex has some connection to pregnancy and babies," explained pro-abortion protester Lona Malachi. "Pregnancy is basically making a woman your slave, just like in The Handmaid's Tale. So as long as sex has anything to do with babies, we simply won't have it!" she exclaimed, before attempting to inhale air without taking in oxygen.

Despite the clarion call for an end to sex from female media personalities and politicians, surveys have shown that absolutely zero men have been affected. "Our research indicates the strike has not hit the intended target," said sociology professor Sharon Young. "The nation's cats, however, have reported a general increase in angry yelling by their owners."

At publishing time, liberals were calling for a hunger strike until it becomes legal for doctors to suck food out of your stomach so eating doesn't risk leading to digestion.

This man shared misinformation online, so the Ministry of Truth -- err, sorry, the Disinformation Governance Board -- detained him for questioning. Will he stand strong in the face of torture?